“To be a guest or to be a planner?” That is the question. Which do I pick when it’s my friends getting married?
I’ve said this before but I’ll say it again: I believe I was CALLED to help others experience life’s most magical moments. Yes, it is something I am good at and that I enjoy doing, but it is what I BELIEVE is my purpose in life. We are all called to something in this life on earth and some of us spend most of our time trying to figure out what it is. For others, it becomes clear very early on.
I met Nikki at church around 2012 when I took a leadership course. Myself and my roommate at the time decided to sit at a certain empty table and these two girls joined us – one of them was Nikki. In just a few minutes of chatting, I quickly connected to her because I could tell we were the “Type A” personalities at the table – our corresponding friends were clearly the “Type B” ones. Time went on and we grew closer for many reasons – we were both hard working, first generation, Filipina women. She was in a serious relationship for a few years at that time and in our mid-twenties, she thought he was the one. Our friendship progressed and a day came where she felt she had to do one of the hardest things in life – she had to end this relationship. I remember the night we had a girls night which included all the necessary girls night things: wine, laughs and tears. I know it was a hard moment for her but as a friend, I remember having so much respect for her in choosing to do something so hard but knowing it was one of those life risks that would later be one of the best things that could happen.
Fast forward a couple years and it turns out she made the right choice because she met Michael. We were now in our late twenties and this relationship was different, it was very grown up. Micheal pursued her and loved her so well. It was obvious they would get married eventually. Their proposal was a sweet surprise that included many loved ones but I had already left San Diego and sadly couldn’t be there for it. On a visit to San Diego and a night on Nikki’s couch, she and Michael said they wanted to talk to me about their wedding. We were laughing and catching up but she looked at me, shifted her tone, and said “I want to ask you a question and want you to be completely honest”. “Okiez – what’s up?” I asked.
“Do you want to be a guest or our planner?” She and Michael continued to tell me that they loved me and that I obviously need to be at their wedding but they also knew I had just started Magical Moments by Megan and they wanted to support me. The choice was mine.
I was so honored that they would give me a choice but it took me only half a second to answer that I would do both: I would be their planner and be a guest. I knew that I would not be ok watching someone else with their special day and that it would be so much more fulfilling, even as a friend, to be able to help them with such a momentous occasion. And let’s be honest – do I even know how to BE just a guest?! The decision was made and we started planning soon after that moment. I walked beside them through the planning process, I helped line them up to walk down the aisle, and I got to have a drink (or two) to cheers to my friends and their beautiful love story.
This experience with Nikki and Michael was not the last time that I got asked the “planner or guest” question and I am so honored to have such loving and supportive friends that they would choose me to help them with one of the biggest days of their lives. I enjoy being there to witness their vows and celebrate with them but I also enjoy knowing that I got to use my gifts and skills to make sure that their day was as close to perfect as possible.
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DJ | DJ Paul Peterson